Deacon Trisha Wilkerson

I despise weakness…
I get overwhelmed. Relational debt, housework debt and procrastinated project dread sneak up, drain the life out of me, and leave me feeling discouraged and flat out weak.  Those overwhelming moments reveal my true weakness. Yet too often, I deny it. Blind with ambition, I reach for my bootstraps, pull myself up, and get back to work.

2 Corinthians 12:9 But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. 10 For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong.

My heart naturally resists depending on God when I’m weak. The noise in my heart, amplified by tough self-sufficiency, can drown out the Holy Spirit’s reminder: “my power is made perfect in your weakness.”

…yet weakness is a gift.
There are the times when his voice breaks through the noise and exposes my heart. It is a struggle to swallow my pride and obey, but it is in that turn of repentance—right in the midst of the mess—that I begin to hope again.

The truth is that I am weak every second, not just when I feel overwhelmed. Jesus wants me to see that when I am overwhelmed, he is giving me a gracious gift: the ability to see more clearly my constant need for him. So rather than denying weakness, I can boast in it because it draws me closer to Jesus in worship.

For example, the other day I was scurrying around the house getting stuff done, feeling very behind on my seemingly urgent tasks. Our third child invited me to play dolls. Pause. Graciously say no, or accept this opportunity to connect with my daughter? In the moment, my heart was faint, overwhelmed with my work. I thought, “I can’t play right now!” Yet, the Holy Spirit changed my thoughts to dependence and flexibility in my weakness. We had a great time playing. When I went back to work, my heart was more tender than it had been previously.

Feeling overwhelmed is a signal to check my heart’s dependence on God. Am I softened to the Holy Spirit? Digging in to depend on God? Do I find my soul’s refreshment in God’s sufficiency? In these times, I’m learning to cling to my Savior, who accomplished perfect work on the cross and continues to save me from my sin. God meets me at the point of my prideful self-sufficiency and lovingly brings me to my knees in worshipful dependence.

Worship through work is not just working hard for God’s glory; it is also in the attitude of humility, realizing how weak and unable we are. We can all grow in dependence on Christ and boast in our weakness. We must humble ourselves before the face of God and thank him for the gift of weakness.

Trisha is the wife of Pastor Mike Wilkerson and mother of four children (2 to 8 years). Mars Hill has been her church home for the past 10 years, where she serves as a deacon at the Ballard Campus in the Redemption Group ministry and as a volunteer counselor. In addition to her bi-weekly posts here, you can read more about what Jesus is teaching her at www.workandworship.com.